(no subject)

[rosiedoes]

You know what really aggravates me? Aside from, y'know, most things?

The American habit of fucking up sentence structure. I thought this was a recent development, but no - I just caught the last minute and a half of Airwolf, and they did it even then!

"Mr Hawke, you've taught me that everything in the outside world is not to be feared."

Read that again: EVERYTHING IN THE OUTSIDE WORLD IS NOT TO BE FEARED.

That sentence implies that everything in the world is safe. Everything is not to be feared. Heights, death, venomous snakes, axe-weilding psychopaths, Evangelists: not to be feared. Broken rails on your rollercoaster: not to be feared. Your baby sticking its fingers in plug sockets: not to be feared.

Why? Because EVERYTHING! IS: NOT TO BE FEARED.

:|


You know what the guy really meant? He meant NOT EVERYTHING IN THE OUTSIDE WORLD IS TO BE FEARED. Yeah, maybe some things do need to be feared: broken bungee ropes, fire, Republicans. But not everything needs to be feared. Fluffy kittens, the Easter Bunny, trolls: not to be feared.

Other examples?

"Well, we all can't fit in the car!" - all of you can't? Why? How small is the car? (Or, more likely, how big are you?) Oh, wait, you mean "You can't all fit in the car"? Because there aren't enough seats for all of you? Why didn't you say so?

"You always can't do this!" He always can't? But he just did! That's why you said it. Did you mean, "You can't always do this?" as in, he can't do this to you all the time? THEN FUCKING SAY THAT!




Seriously, America. The spellings I can handle but changing a sentence around so that the subject becomes something other than what you mean? Is just confusing. And wrong. Please stop.



Edit: scoobygang63 just made the following excellent point:

Similarly, I get very confused by sentences like "I could care less!" as opposed to "I couldn't care less!". Surely the former means you DO care, even if it's just a teensy bit, but what it seems to mean to the people who use it is the latter example, that they really don't care at all. Very confusing.

-- srsly.

Comments

[scoobygang63.livejournal.com]

Similarly, I get very confused by sentences like "I could care less!" as opposed to "I couldn't care less!". Surely the former means you DO care, even if it's just a teensy bit, but what it seems to mean to the people who use it is the latter example, that they really don't care at all. Very confusing.

[moondarri.livejournal.com]

ahh, i know! listening to fall out boy's yule shoot your eye out brings me great pain, because, because, 'merry christmas, i could care less' makes it sound like christmas is okay, really, when the rest of the song woul suggest otherwise. *handflail* i do not get that saying.

[rosiedoes.livejournal.com]

I'm going to tag this in at the bottom of the post, because that totally pisses me off, too.

[scoobygang63.livejournal.com]

Yup, the most irritating of Americanisms. I feel your pain.

[moondarri.livejournal.com]

ohgod, it took me a ridiculous amount of time to figure out what the guy meant, in that first one. ugh, that was awful.

on the positive side, this post made the grammar geek inside me all gleeful. i enjoy correctness. :D

[rosiedoes.livejournal.com]

I just don't understand how they can not see that they're talking bollocks.

[ashe-frost.livejournal.com]

I also kind of hate the phrase "just because", because I don't think it makes sense. "Just because you're older than me doesn't mean you can boss me around." As opposed to, "You can't boss me around because you're older than me." It's just.. Why?

[rosiedoes.livejournal.com]

JUST BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE DUMB.

[ashe-frost.livejournal.com]

It makes me cringe. I HATE THAT.

And all improper grammar and sentences that don't make sense. I mean, I don't mind if people bend grammar.. I start sentences with And and But and Also and use elipses emphatically but.. I just kind of hate it when people are stupid and you can't understand what they're saying.

[rosiedoes.livejournal.com]

Me too. As long as it's coherent and means what you intend it to mean, I can deal with bending the rules of grammar, but changing the statement in a sentence because you're too stupid to put the words in the right order is not cool.

[scoobygang63.livejournal.com]

I have issues with starting sentences with but. I was told not to, and then told that it's okay for news writing because you don't want long sentences. Starting sentences with however, however, is still not on.

[rosiedoes.livejournal.com]

I do both of those things. On purpose.


Don't read my fic, dude.

[scoobygang63.livejournal.com]

So do I. But I also sometimes abuse prescription medication and drink until I can't see without covering one eye. Just because I do it, doesn't make it right.

[rosiedoes.livejournal.com]

HAHAHAHAHA.

[likethepaint.livejournal.com]

People actually say that kind of stuff? Oh man. I haven't heard any of the first examples before but "I could care less" annoys the hell of of me every single time I listen to that song. It's like, completely contradictory.

[sharon-hate.livejournal.com]

We're like the Beverly hillbillies.

(I debated for a long time whether or not 'hillbillies' should be capitalized, but since I am referring to a group of people and not the show, I decided against it.)

[rosiedoes.livejournal.com]

Hahaha.

I don't think it's everyone, but damn - it seems to have permeated popular culture and it drives me nuts.

[missfrost.livejournal.com]

If you read the US newspapers, as I have to for work, they get even weirder. The oddest thing is missing out the word 'on' as in 'The President will announce Tuesday that...' or 'we will be investigating Wednesday...' Why? What's Wednesday done?
Yet they're very formal - where we'd start off saying George Bush and then refer to him as Bush, they'd say Mr. Bush, note the full stop after Mr., which is pretty obsolete here. Similarly it's always U.S.A.