I'm not going to lie; it's tempting to defriend you, dude, because now I think you're an idiot and I don't have idiots on my flist. And I feel like you're weak and you're deluding yourself; making excuses and throwing away reasons for me to respect you, because I can't now believe that you're as smart a person as I thought you were.
You're saying that you're doing this for yourself, but that's bullshit. You're doing it because people around you are and that provides temptation. They may not be pressuring you, but you're trying to be like them and to keep up - as perhaps you were doing to an extent in copying your straight edge friends. Do you really enjoy being drunk? Do you really enjoy being around people who are pissed off their tits and having to be the person to take care of them? Because I don't believe that you do. If this is about control, drinking is the worst possible way you can regain any of that. It's like the old adage of "fucking for virginity". It doesn't work, and I know that you know that.
If you're conflicted about doing something that you know is bad for you - bad physically, bad economically because you're a student and living on shit money (and you can't keep drinking everyone else's stash without buying your own, for long), bad socially, because the more often you drink, the more often people will expect you to drink and the greater tolerance you will build up to it.
Nothing positive comes from this. If you want to exercise some control over yourself, make youself get up and go running for an hour at 6am every day; give yourself a target number of books to read a week, and stick to that. There are ways to exercise control that don't involve breaking your own moral code and pumping yourself full of shit that you don't need and is ultimately only going to have a detrimental effect.
This shouldn't be inspired by respecting or admiring me, or Jen or Andy fucking Hurley; it should be inspired by respecting yourself. Respecting your own sense of decency and your own values - never mind your own body and mind.
What do you get from drinking? Maybe you feel a bit less inhibited? Perhaps your college mates bug you about it less? Is that really worth putting yourself into a conflicted state internalling and giving up a lifestyle you were proud of for? Because I don't believe that it is. I've been where you are - drinking because it's The Done Thing And Why Shouldn't I? - but before I ever even knew that straight edge existed. I would never go back there. I would never give up something that matters to me - as I know it does to you.
I find it hard to like or respect people who make stupid decisions about which they should clearly no better. I have people on my flist who are stoners and were stoners when I met them and I thoroughly disapprover, but none of them have claimed to make a conscious decision to do something that is harmful, expensive and which they regarded as stupid until that point.
Your explanation makes no sense to me. It just sounds as though you're in denial about caving to social norms because you really want to think you're too strong for that.
You're a good person and you're an intelligent person and I think you are way, way better than this bullshit. Why lower yourself to their level instead of trying to bring them up to yours?
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no subject
on 2008-11-03 02:25 am (UTC)You're saying that you're doing this for yourself, but that's bullshit. You're doing it because people around you are and that provides temptation. They may not be pressuring you, but you're trying to be like them and to keep up - as perhaps you were doing to an extent in copying your straight edge friends. Do you really enjoy being drunk? Do you really enjoy being around people who are pissed off their tits and having to be the person to take care of them? Because I don't believe that you do. If this is about control, drinking is the worst possible way you can regain any of that. It's like the old adage of "fucking for virginity". It doesn't work, and I know that you know that.
If you're conflicted about doing something that you know is bad for you - bad physically, bad economically because you're a student and living on shit money (and you can't keep drinking everyone else's stash without buying your own, for long), bad socially, because the more often you drink, the more often people will expect you to drink and the greater tolerance you will build up to it.
Nothing positive comes from this. If you want to exercise some control over yourself, make youself get up and go running for an hour at 6am every day; give yourself a target number of books to read a week, and stick to that. There are ways to exercise control that don't involve breaking your own moral code and pumping yourself full of shit that you don't need and is ultimately only going to have a detrimental effect.
This shouldn't be inspired by respecting or admiring me, or Jen or Andy fucking Hurley; it should be inspired by respecting yourself. Respecting your own sense of decency and your own values - never mind your own body and mind.
What do you get from drinking? Maybe you feel a bit less inhibited? Perhaps your college mates bug you about it less? Is that really worth putting yourself into a conflicted state internalling and giving up a lifestyle you were proud of for? Because I don't believe that it is. I've been where you are - drinking because it's The Done Thing And Why Shouldn't I? - but before I ever even knew that straight edge existed. I would never go back there. I would never give up something that matters to me - as I know it does to you.
I find it hard to like or respect people who make stupid decisions about which they should clearly no better. I have people on my flist who are stoners and were stoners when I met them and I thoroughly disapprover, but none of them have claimed to make a conscious decision to do something that is harmful, expensive and which they regarded as stupid until that point.
Your explanation makes no sense to me. It just sounds as though you're in denial about caving to social norms because you really want to think you're too strong for that.
You're a good person and you're an intelligent person and I think you are way, way better than this bullshit. Why lower yourself to their level instead of trying to bring them up to yours?